The Beast

Imagine, if you will, a creature with two heads. One head is on the end of a long extended tendril and the other hovers above. The monster drools and slobbers all over its cave-like floor, and with the precision of an Olympic archer can shoot a blast of liquid heat straight into your face! This is the loathsome brute we encountered on our first night in our new home!

It really doesn't have a scary face...I added this for effect.

Now imagine two Rubes from Virginia trying to figure out how to use their new European fixtures…probably not the best showing by the Yanks since the battle of the Ardennes.

As I was tucking in nicely with our the two dogs and a good book on our air mattress (borrowed air mattress I might add - along with the two barstools left by the landlord – our only sticks of furniture at the current time), I heard a series of water gushing followed by a litany of expletives (we shall not repeat) emanating from the bathroom.

After several clicks and a few rushes of water – plus the curse words – I deduced there might be a problem. As a problem solver, I ambled into lavatory to see what I could do to help. Help I did not! Upon tweaking and turning the various knobs, I was actually able to land a direct hit into Jeni’s unsuspecting left eyeball! The stupid jets were at a perfect level to hit her squarely in the face!

Beyond our Laurel-and-Hardy-esque caper, we can’t seem to figure out how to seal the glass doors. So this thing leaks all over the floor, and we just mop it up every morning – yeah, Rubes! It’s also impossible to keep clean. Oh well…the adventure continues. We’ll figure it out.

We're back online - Yea!! - but only with an analog DSL line. The dream of the nineties is alive in Luxembourg! Fiber Optic cable should be installed in a few more weeks.